shortcoming, NOW is the time to find ways of compensating for it. Develop dhose desirable traits you have which would make your friends, relatives, and associates forget about any physical deficiencies. 7. Don't expect to be completely free from fear. There are many circimstances in which it is both dangerous and mentally unhealthy not to be afraid. In the presence of real danger, physical or social, fear is desirable. Were it not for fear of disease, would medical science have made the progress it has? Upon experiencing physical disease do we not visit a competent physician? Fear of what the disease may mean helps us to maintain a sense of self-preservation. We see that a realistic fear acts defensively for us as a danger signal, and helps us keep out of difficulties. Fear can sometimes be a blessing in disguise. Only when our fears are exaggerated and unrealistic are the effects harmful.

Having examined some of the more effective methods of conquering fear and worry, let us now examine one of the most important fears confronting nearly every homosexual: the fear of disapproval.

It is a well-known fact that throughout most of our westem civilization, the homosexual is condemned, ridiculed and ostracized. He is led to believe that his method of sexual expression is dirty, immoral, sinful, unnatural and perverse. Modem scientific research has shown that homosexuality is no different from heterosexuality except in the direction of one's love object. Although the attitudes of the general public towards sex have become less stringent within the last fifty years, homosexuality still remains a largely forbidden and taboo subject. Is it any wonder then, that there is so much discrimination, intolerance, and prejudice based on ignorance directed against the homosexual? The situation is made even more tragic by the fact that most homosexuals choose to sit back in silence and allow these terrible injustices to continue. The fear of disapproval has prevented homophiles from taking the action necessary to free themselves from the bonds of social inequality. As long as this fear govems, primarily, the thoughts and actions of homosexuals, very little progress can be made in gaining general lublic acceptance. If the homophile is to become an integrated member of society, he must learn to voercome this fear. I will now discuss in detail a workable method for doing it. The rest is up to the individual.

The average homosexual tends to keep the fact of his homosexuality a closely guarded secret and tried to assume the characteristics of the heterosexual because he imagines that there will be nothing but condemnation, scorn, ridicule and abuse from the outside world if his true nature is discovered. When in heterosexual company, he is careEVIEWN

mattachine

ful to see that he is wearing the "mask" properly. Going through life. wearing a mask luts a special strain upon the individual and often brings on a neurotic condition, which is the result of trying to lead a double life. As if this weren't enough, it blocks the way toward acceptance, compassion and understanding because the homosexual is constantly trying to be something he is not.

It was mentioned earlier that one of the most effective ways of overcoming fear is to do the thing we fear or place ourselves in the situ ation of which we are afraid. Revealing our true nature to our families, heterosexual friends, and employers and informing them of the truth about what it means to be homosexual may be the only means by which acceptance can be gained and the fear of disapproval overcome. There will be a great deal of reluctance on the part of many to do this because they feel that letting outsiders know about themselves can only result in family disgrace, loss of social prestige and loss of job. Blatantly and indiscriminately announcing our homosexuality would be as risky as diving head-first into a rocky stream without knowing the depth of the water. It would therefore be advisable to assess honestly and truthfully the amount of disapproval that might result from each individual case. If there is likely to be none, is there any reason why you shouldn't go ahead and tell them? If disapproval is likely to result isn't is a good idea to improve relations with that person to the extent that there wkuld be acceptance, understanding and compassion instead of contempt and condemnation? Abraham Lincoln once wrote: "If you would win a man to your cause, first convince him that you are his dincere friend". In cases where revealing your homosexual tendencies is not likely to get a sympathetic reception, it is uo to you to see to it that you are better liked by that individual to the extent that such a reception becomes likely. Here are some things that can be done which have almost always helped improve a person's relationships with others:

1. Take a genuine interest in others. Without being nosey, take an interest in the affairs, problems, interests and attitudes of those you know. Do the kind of favors you know they appreciate, even if it means going out of your way. Always think of the things you can do for them. It is then a matter of being sure that those things are done. 2. Show appreciation for others. Make it a point to express your praise and admiration for the things other people exhibit. Be certain that what you say is sincere. Never use flattery. Flattery tends to make enemies because it is deceitful. Honest, sincere appreciation is craved by nearly everyone. Look for ways to honestly help others feel important.